Marcel's first night on life-support 7-23-05

Marcel's first night on life-support

July 23, 2005 3 AM
ICU Waiting Room - freezing cold, Northridge Hospital

Marcel's first night on life-support

Marcel was put on a Respirator and medically induced coma (sedation) three hours ago when he could no longer breathe on his own while on oxygen assist.
Earlier in day and night, following ER the night before, my supportive sister Faye was with us, dear friend Shelly R., and Rabbi Eli Rivkin, offering prayers.

MY Bear overcame fear.
Marcel worked hardest to overcome all obstacles to be #1 and he was.  A really hard challenge for Marcel was his severe scoliosis getting in the way of his good golf swing.  (The corrective Harrington rod was always in the way of reading x-rays and diagnosing tumors fully).

The last thing Marcel did tonight was to try to breathe on his own.  Marcel told us that he was really scared and asked us not to leave him. Marcel needed the help of Hashem. The breath of G*d.  Marcel chose to battle like a warrior and do it. He wanted the chance to try his best, so he chose to try the respirator, his own tool of his Pulmonary ICU trade; To see if he could do it on his own.  Marcel had written in all his Medical Directives "NO" and said, "NO" to the respirator in front of all the doctors when he could no longer breathe.  Marcel told me whom to call. 

I called Aviva and I then told Marcel that Aviva would come the next day.  Marcel said, "Give me a few days and I will see how I do."

Prior to that in his last days of physical therapy, I watched Marcel as he was directed and motivated to sit on the edge of the bed (in his paraplegic condition) and to let go of his two hands, and not hold on. Not with even one.  The fear factor was great but Marcel showed all of us watching that he could do it!  I remember a couple years ago at Cedars-Sinai hospital following another spinal cored decompression surgery, that Marcel was petrified getting out of bed with PT assistance with paralysis beginning, and the bed was right next to a big scary clear glass picture window on a high floor overlooking the city.  Marcel did his best.

Just before entering the hospital this time and on Marcel's last outing a couple days ago in the wheelchair van after visiting the plastic surgeon, wearing his beautiful new Hawaiian t-shirt that Aviva and Brett brought back from their honeymoon, I ran (so that we would not miss the van) a couple of blocks in 100* + temp to get Marcel the sandwich he loved from the kosher butcher - turkey with corned beef on rye with pickle.  The night before that I brought Marcel an Indian vegie meal which he loved and the night before that I brought to Marcel a Chinese fish dish with cabbage, his favorite, and also a Subway tuna sandwich, all his favorites in the last few days, not knowing that these were his last meals.  Not doing well, Marcel worked hard at enjoying his meals, and especially that Kosher sandwich which I had cut into small portions.  We shared the pickle. Marcel was #1 in enjoying his meals.

love, JOY

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